What to Say to Someone who Has just Had a Miscarriage
When somebody close to you has had a miscarriage or spontaneous abortion, it can be an extremely difficult subject to broach. Knowing what to say, or what not to say can be especially hard when you just want to try and make that person feel better. Many women suffer miscarriages, however it is a topic that can be widely guarded, mainly due to the emotional trauma and feeling of grief that often consumes the woman who has miscarried, so acting with sensitivity, support and care is important. Here at oneHOWTO we're going to try and advise what to say to someone who has just had a miscarriage.
I'm sorry for your loss, for your pain, for yours and your partner's sadness; are all kind and heartfelt words to hear if you have suffered a miscarriage. And sometimes that is all that can or needs to be said, it will all depend on the person's willingness to talk about the subject.
Whatever you're feeling is valid and it's ok
Many women feel a whole mixture of feelings when they have suffered a miscarriage, including anxiety, fear, depression, anger and even guilt as many women unnecessarily blame themselves. Letting them feel and come to terms with their feelings is much more helpful than telling them they 'shouldn't' feel a certain way. Make sure you let the person express their feelings and give them time and space to accept the miscarriage, everyone has their own mourning process.
You're not to blame
As mentioned before, guilt and blame are some of the feelings that someone who has miscarried can feel. Unfortunately it can take time to come to terms with a miscarriage and 'why' it happened, although often there is no explanation. If you know that person is experiencing these feelings, it may be soothing to hear something along these lines.
I'm here to listen if you want to talk
Having a friend there to listen can be one of the most valuable things when somebody has suffered a loss of any kind. Often saying nothing and just listening is the most help you can be to a person and I'm sure they will truly appreciate it.
I've been through this myself and I understand how you're feeling
If you have suffered a miscarriage and feel comfortable talking about it, then it could be helpful for this person to hear how you dealt with and overcame such a sad experience.
This article is merely informative, oneHOWTO does not have the authority to prescribe any medical treatments or create a diagnosis. We invite you to visit your doctor if you have any type of condition or pain.
If you want to read similar articles to What to Say to Someone who Has just Had a Miscarriage, we recommend you visit our Family health category.